don’t let them stifle you,
don’t let them make you call it a day,
or call it a lifetime,
or call yourself crazy,
fear not the dark, or being alone,
don’t fear marauding dogs,
armed gunmen,
or the Zika virus,
or the shrinking glacier,
don’t fear the savage politicians…
or back-pedaling middle-managers,
or the real estate racketeers,
don’t fear the phone,
or foreign hackers,
or panic attacks,
don’t worry so much,
it’s just opening night jitters,
stay strong, stay in your lane,
and keep off the main roads,
play Rachmaninoff on the car stereo,
and spend an afternoon playing 3-card poker,
and drinking watered down bourbon sours,
at the Mardi Gras,
don’t look back, there’s nothing to see,
keep it moving
Category Archives: Uncategorized
Florida derby
Once, I wanted to paint
but the canvas
wasn’t there
I found, instead
just an old bed sheet
that someone
had left out in the
early morning
Miami rain…
…poor visibility
and cataracts
cloud my
judgement.
I
find comfort in
your arms when
the weather beats
against the shutters,
when the old
drunks clatter
down the street
at 4AM
when there is
a truck abandoned
at the end of the block
with its lights still on
when
a life is lost
or
a soul forgotten.
I think of
a shipwreck
twenty years ago
…I dream of youth
and riding the finest
horse in the world
across the finish line.
We’ve never lost have we?
tax time
Naked
and afraid?
Who, you?
me?
Not a chance
dig your
pink painted toes
into the sand and
file the extension.
Then kiss me
like we have no
real chance
of going home.
It’s a two and
a half hour
flight to
Tegucigalpa, so
call up the relatives
and pretend
there’s a new investor
named Ferdinand
and he’s burning
cash like there
is no tomorrow.
Just kiss me
again and
say if there
is such a thing
as real love
you’ve found it here
on deadbeat beach.
In a week we will
be on the bus
to Choluteca
drinking warm beer
and laughing about
the last check we
left for the
landlord.
The Upper Keys bagel poem
after all
the skiff is still upright
the shadows have
hastened away, and
you and I are upright
as well…
and waiting for the next
thing to happen
AS we wait for the
quiet of mid-morning
to slink in like some
old washed up
guitar player,
like some has-been
drugged out rock star
like some careless,
busted, fishing guide.
We wait until the traffic slows
on the OS Highway
so we can walk up to the
bagel shop where that
guy named Nigel says
he has the best damned
bagels south of Brooklyn
but you say he hasn’t got
a clue as to what goes
into a bagel
you tell me that he’s
too self-absorbed.
You tell me
there is not
a fucking
bagel
worth
eating
south of Cape May, New Jersey.
We eat our bagels
in peace – on the deck
of the best damned
Brooklyn Bagel dive
in the Upper Keys.
You wave to
some driver in
a furniture truck
barreling
south on US 1
you tell me, that
he’s driving too fast
and in the end
it’s all just another
accident waiting
to happen.
Safety in numbers/surviving the inquisition
So there’s safety in numbers?
don’t believe any of it
don’t think that you’ll be that face in the crowd
the guy in the Macy’s parade wearing the hat
the guy in the bank line wearing patent leather shoes
don’t think that you are part of a movement
…there is no movement.
Don’t read the papers…they don’t exist
Don’t think you will survive the inquisition
they know where you are
they know you’ve worked in shipping
for the past seventeen years, and
they know you’re 63 years old and
you drink too much.
They know you…they can pull you out
of line whenever they want
and stick a cold, soup-line finger into your chin
ouch…it’s 1932 all over again
bite your lip. Stand up straight.
So let them do it.
You’re a little punch drunk now.
In half an hour you’ll realize that
…none of it matters…
You’re Just a frazzled old beatnik at heart
Writing poems, and
telephoning friends before
looking around for a bus ride out of town.
a short poem about eternity
don’t talk eternity with me
until you’ve sailed out to the offing in a rental boat
and considered the molecules in the sea
and the sand on the shores of the Dry Tortugas
don’t remind me of the million year rain
or the damned great beasts,
just curl up behind me in the night
when the wind is high and the last new moon
of the year is about half a mile behind
(and remind me that the old traitor
is afraid of the dark)
It’s raining so kiss me
like there is never going to be
another geologic upheaval
don’t pretend that you and I
have not been smooching
like this for at least
ten thousand years.
Take off your clothes
and listen to the waves
slap up against her hull,
she’s been around for a while
but she will never sink,
not here
not tonight
toothache on Sunday
Don’t say it doesn’t hurt
just go down to the clinic on Fremont
where the 83 year old
dentist with the
rented drill hangs his hat.
Be there at 8AM and ask if he has
had a drink today.
He doesn’t care if you
pay today, so
ask if he can drill
a little carefully
(is he steady?).
Can he send you back
to the brick factory
intact?
Ask if he can pull the
offender out of line.
Make him press
the arrogant bastard up against the wall
and put a pistol to his head,
make him talk, and
threaten him like an aging
third world dictator
with a glass eye
and a case of syphilis.
…
Old dentist doesn’t take shit
from any offender
or so he says…
…
I say,
screw the orders
screw the old dentist
with his rented 1950’s drill
“give it a rest old man”
there’s no oil in that hole…
no gold in that mine
I’ll just kill the pain
with a stop at the Freeway Pub
I’ll tell them all
I have 97 more years left in me,
At least, so
they can’t stop me now…
…if it’s not one thing
it’s something else,
pain is good for the soul.
Remembering 2/26/1993
Sometime in late January, or early February, 1993, I sloshed my way through the streets of New York City’s Financial District, toward the World Trade Center. At the time, I was working as a consultant in the IT department of a Wall Street bank. The technical recruiter for my consulting company had invited me to have lunch with her at the Atrium Café, located in the Winter Garden, just outside of the Trade Center. My contract at the bank was winding down and she had a new opportunity that she wanted to discuss with me.
It was a bleak day, with a cold wind blowing in off of the freezing waters of the Hudson. I remember thinking I wished I had rescheduled this lunch as I trudged up Wall Street to Trinity Church, past the graveyard where Alexander Hamilton, Robert Fulton (and many other notables) are buried. I turned right and walked up Church Street for a bit before turning left to cut across to Liberty Plaza Park where I often lingered on pleasant summer days.
My favorite bench in Liberty Plaza Park featured a life sized, bronze sculpture of a man in a suit and tie, sitting on the bench, preparing for a meeting by checking his essential items in an open briefcase. The name of this popular piece of sculpture is “Double Check” by the famed artist, John Seward Johnson. On nice days, I enjoyed spending a bit of my lunch hour sitting beside my friend “D.C.” with a coffee and a book. But not on this day. I was frozen to the bone and my feet were soaked after stepping off a curb into a puddle of slush. Nevertheless, I nodded to D.C. as I hurried by ‘my bench’ resolving to return on a warmer day.
The Winter Garden was one of my favorite places in lower Manhattan. Situated at the end of a 400 foot pedestrian bridge that spanned West Street, connecting it to the World Trade Center, this atrium was a world apart from the often bleak, windswept, slushy streets of downtown New York. With its fully grown palm trees and tropical foliage, the spacious Winter Garden was a refuge for downtown office workers seeking an bright, cheerful place to lunch on days such as the one described here.
I don’t recall much about that lunch date, except I was in no hurry to rush back to work. I remember that we lingered for some time over coffee, watching the hundreds, if not thousands, of mid-day visitors to lower Manhattan pass by, hurrying away to a million destinations. I did not know it then, but this would be my final lunch in the Winter Garden.
In late February I travelled to Atlanta for a conference. The weather in Atlanta was not much of an improvement over the weather in New York. It was cold and wet. On day two of the conference, a freezing rain fell on the city covering everything in a layer of treacherous ice. By Friday, February 26, I was ready to go home, and I was grateful that the conference ended at noon. Another storm was approaching the Atlanta area and I wanted to get out of town before it arrived. I breathed a sigh of relief when my early afternoon flight home lifted off right on time. Two hours later when I got off of the plane at Newark’s Liberty airport, it was apparent that something had happened while I was airborne. Something big. Heavily armed police were everywhere, many with dogs. There was tension in the air. None of my fellow passengers had any idea of what was going on.
I know it’s hard to believe in this day of smart phones, in-flight wi-fi, tweets and newsfeeds, but I made it all the way to baggage claim before I actually found someone who knew what was happening.
“Didn’t you hear,” said a lady beside me at the baggage carrousel, “they’ve blown up the World Trade Center.”
Shocked, I rushed to the nearest pay phone to call my wife to find out what was going on. (Remember – this is 1993 and cell phones were more or less a luxury item. I would not own one for another three years.) My wife explained to me that while the World Trade Center was not ‘blown up’, a powerful bomb had gone off doing extensive damage. Lower Manhattan was totally sealed off with all bridges and tunnels closed as authorities feared other acts of terrorism.
All in all, six people lost their lives that day, including 36 year old Monica Rodriguez Smith who was seven months pregnant. Ms. Smith was doing mundane office chores in her basement office when the bomb exploded. In addition to the six deaths, over 1000 were injured.
Because of the magnitude of the tragedy eight years later on September 11, 2001, the events of the 2/26 World Trade Center bombing are sometimes overlooked. Today, however, I am remembering the day and the victims of that first attack, a day that shook the world for so many of us.
*
On December 31, 1994, my wife and I celebrated the approaching New Year in an Italian restaurant in New York’s Little Italy neighborhood. For that night we’d booked a room in the recently reopened Marriott Hotel in the north tower of the World Trade Center. Once known as the Vista hotel, the new Marriott occupied the first 22 stories of the north tower and had been closed for a year and a half for reconstruction after the terrorist attack of 1993.
The next day we strolled the deserted streets of lower Manhattan, walking between the World Trade Center and South Street Seaport. I took my wife to all of my old haunts. In Liberty Plaza Park I found my friend “Double Check” and we paused for a picture. That was my last visit to the Park and the last time I sat beside D.C. on the granite bench. The next time I would see a picture of D.C. would be in photos taken of the aftermath of 9/11.
Liberty Plaza Park sustained heavy damage in the 9/11 attacks, as did my friend D.C. The park would later be rebuilt and in 2006, it was renamed, Zuccotti Park. My friend D.C. sustained damage in the attacks but he was refurbished by Johnson, and now, renamed “Makeshift Memorial”, he has been returned to the park.
I am glad he is home.

With my pal Double Check (D.C.) in New York City, January 1, 1995
don’t change a thing
don’t change a thing
please
don’t move
the McCoy pottery vase
that has stood
on the cherry wood table
in the front room
for the past 16 years,
leave it where it is…
…
leave the paper roses
where you found them
on the porch swing,
crumpled and soaked
in port wine,
leave the keys to the
’75 Chrysler New Yorker on the
Grand Hotel Key Rack
beside the basement
stairs
remember
it’s all in the details,
so don’t move anything
if you don’t have to
…
pretend
it’s morning again
So just – roll over,
it’s only 8 am
sleep for another hour
after all, the trains
don’t run on Sunday
later on
we’ll take the dogs out and
let them run
along the shore of the lake
just don’t change a thing
I’ll turn my hat around
and wear it backwards
I will offer you a clove cigarette
and a cup of black coffee
we’ll walk to
the railroad bridge
and we will put our back
to the summer wind
but we won’t change
a damned thing
ever, if we know
what’s good for us.
Big Torch Key 2003
last night I recalled
the white granite counter
where we placed
our empties
on the last night
we spent together
in the house on
Big Torch Key
…
Do you remember
that third-floor
mattress…
that
lumpy, damp,
Keys,
rainy season
mattress?
…
Remember
how you said
you would
go back to Pensacola and work
in a pancake house
during spring break
before you’d ever
spend a day fishing
with me
…ever again…
remember
the debris
on the floor,
…
the empty bottles and
a dozen or so
purple, plastic cups,
some once
filled with
Old Oak rum,
others with
Fairbanks port,
dead soldiers…
lined up and
catching rain water,
on that last night
we spent together
…
wasn’t there a
cell phone left
on the dock in
the afternoon rain?
and wasn’t
your lavender, bikini
left to dry on the center console of
the Boston Whaler?
do you miss me?
Screw technology…
the Old Man himself
calls the shots and
marches on
with or without us
…
lazy palms lean into the
late spring breeze like
there will never be
another storm
…
I remember how
I found you asleep
and
I kissed you on the cheek
at sunrise